Friday, May 9, 2014

Once Upon a Friday Afternoon Hammer...somewhat of a guide to man yard sale-ing

Once upon a week ago, on a Friday afternoon, I did the usual routine of picking the girls up after school, when....

da da da duuuummmm.

YARD SALE!

Have you seen the bumper stickers saying "I BRAKE FOR YARD SALES"?

I don't have one of those.  and I don't brake for yard sales.  But I DO turn around for yard sales.

sometimes. 

I've gotten better at ignoring them.  But they sure do taunt me as I drive by.  They have a taunting nature in general.  Their balloons fly around in my rear view mirror, saying things like, "I had the world's best and cheapest treasure and you don't have time for me?!"  They all think they have the world's best treasure. 
 At this particular Friday afternoon yard sale, there were a bunch of guys standing around with a bunch of tools.  This kind used to be an easy pass by.  But now that I'm an empowered woman,  

 I need those tools.

And so, with the girls getting older, I occasionally find it acceptable to pull over and say something like, "okay.  Stay right here. I won't be long." and "Hey look over there! There are goats on the roof!" 

 
Both are true. I won't be long. And there really were goats on the roof.  

Yes, I can go through other people's junk like nobody's business.

Every once in awhile, I might give a thing a good 3 minutes to try to convince me of its magical powers...you know, the ability to turn from what may seem (to the untrained eye) as total junk, into an object of somethingness  (usefulness, beautifulness, ability to make a person fill up with happiness...fill in the blank), and therefore worthy of my great affection, as well as a dollar or two from a to-be-determined line item in our budget.

This was one of those items:


AND IT WAS FRIDAY AFTERNOON!!!!

Now I don't know about you, but if I find a Friday Afternoon Hammer on a FRIDAY AFTERNOON, it is to be considered as divine interruption, and it must be mine. Plus it says right on the box that it's a "tool box must have".  so.  

Clearly marked on painter's tape, this guy was asking 5 dollars. The thing about guys at yard sales is they tend to either overprice, or pretty much give the stuff away. 

Here are two simple, junk truth equations that apply to man yard sale-ing:

1.  A man's stuff (the things he owns) = OVERPRICED

2.  A man's wife's stuff, girlfriend's stuff, mother's stuff, kid's stuff, (pretty much anything that did not previously belong to the man, unless it's a gifted sweater or a tie) = PLEASE TAKE THIS OUT OF MY GARAGE!

This was not the get it out of my garage type of man sale.  And so I polished up my feminine yard sale graces and made an offer (in question form...I especially use questions when bargaining with a man), with my cash in hand. 

Think "with a man, cash in hand".
I offered 3, and then happily walked away with my meant-to-be Friday Afternoon Hammer.  

Not only is this little tool efficient with its bottle opening, ice crushing capabilities, it is also witty.  The box says things like, "warning: may cause pounding headache" and "warning: may cause neighbors to swing by".

Despite its bad sense of humor, this hammer will prove useful for doll house projects. If you also need a Friday Afternoon Hammer with a bad sense of humor on this Friday afternoon, this one is on sale.


How are you making your today world beautiful?

and maybe more importantly...

What has been your latest and greatest 
yard sale find?  

(Please share both with me in the comments below.)

Happy Friday Everyone!!!

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2 comments:

  1. OH my gosh...you make me WANT to try exploring a GARAGE SALE!!!!

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